I had a really good title for this post, but forgot it

Well I just don't get it. Here I was feeling good for a few days now, even starting to think this really was all anxiety, and thinking just maybe I could be normal pretty soon, and I'm sure I don't have to tell you where this sentence is going right?

Whaaaaaaat? Is going on? Balance and nausea galore today. Well here's how it went. Woke up pretty much normal. Did pretty good surfing the blogs this morning. Took a shower, and hmmm, let's see, went to make lunch and the stomach just went bonkers.

It felt like it was churning butter in there. I started to get sick to my stomach, and then I thought I was off balance. Now I say thought because I didn't really feel off balance while standing or walking, just that it felt like I was somewhere deep down. Maybe because I was thinking it and thinking that's what was making my stomach so yucky.

Naturally I did what I always do when I have an upset stomach, and that is to eat Mexican food. I am not kidding, I've never known a burrito not to cure my stomach troubles. It's as good as Tums.

Unfortunately nachos must not work, because that's all I had fixins for and I have to say I wasn't exactly cured. HOWEVER, I did feel loads better, and started to feel pretty darn normal again, until we got in the car to go over the hill. The jerking car movements, and the windy turns made my balance and stomach revolt. Luckily it wasn't a complete mutiny and nothing went overboard.

Oddly (or maybe not so much) enough I felt pretty good when we were visiting the rooster which was our first stop. Our final destination was Matt's work, but we had to make a few stops before then. Not until I got a milkshake, and we were at Matt's work, did I start feeling good again.

I played my games while he was in a meeting, and everything was great. I did take a kind of hard spin in the chair during a particularly engaging moment in my game, and started to feel off again, but it pretty much went away quickly.

THEN I made the mistake of getting up to go to the bathroom. Walking across the building I felt like I was going to explode. That pressure cooker feeling hit big time, and my ears started to feel full and my heart was pounding so hard, and then those white flashes in my eyes started. Now it sounds like I was going to pass out, but I don't think so. I didn't really feel that way, but I did feel like I was walking in pea soup for a bit. Luckily by the time I got to the kitchen area it went away. It was very short experience, but very severe. So much so, that I didn't go to the bathroom. I wasn't about to lock myself alone in a room after that experience.

So I went back and played my games, until we left which wasn't very much longer. I was fine, but it shook me a bit, and when we were leaving I didn't really feel comfortable going home just yet.

So we went shopping. I'm telling you retail therapy works. It can be expensive, but it cures the problems. At least for a bit.

Anyway I got some really cool stuff for my collages, and I'm so pleased with my loot because remember those disasters I made yesterday? Well they are totally cool today. In fact the one I hated the most is my new favorite! I know I've done this before, and I really just need to learn patience.

I always want instant results with my work and I want it done now. I do not like to wait, and if it starts to come out crappy I get super discouraged. Every time this happens, I always am able to fix it eventually. It may be a week later, but It will work out in the end.

Darn it, why don't I remember that when I'm actually working? Yesterday I was all ready to ban myself from making anymore art. Good thing I didn't.

Anyway, when we finally got home tonight, I had another issue, getting out of the car. The pressure thing happened again. Not as bad as before, but then I started to feel like I couldn't stand balance wise, and because it was dark it was hard to see, so I sort of started feeling disoriented. Yuck.

It went away once I got cooking, and started doing things around the house, and we ended up watching Aqua teen Hunger Force for a couple hours, and I was fine that whole time.

Now I just came up from the studio, and felt good while creating and still feel good now. Hope this stays for the night.