Daily Inspiration

I release the need to determine how things “should” be.

If you are suffering in your life right now, I can guarantee that this condition is tied up with some kind of attachment to how things should be going. -Dr. Wayne Dyer

Hello!! Is he listening in on my therapy sessions??

This is today's daily inspiration. It comes at a perfect time, as just last night I was having issues with my current condition. See after I wrote my post, I started getting the really bad balance issues while sitting, laying and moving around. Even while watching t.v. I played my game a bit and it took my mind off of it, but then when I stopped, I felt the balance shit all over again.

Needless to say, I was feeling exactly how the quote says. I kept thinking how things should be. I should be normal. (I actually do this all the time), but it's hard not to, when just last year I was able to sit in chairs, beds, couches etc, without feeling a terrible balance issue, so that is how it should still be.

Why am I not like that now, unless something is actually wrong with me? Just for the record, this balance feeling is a lot different from the balance issues I get while standing talking to people and generally am scared. It's a more intense feeling and it feels more deep.

And I'm fine, until I move. As usual it's very difficult to explain, which makes even harder to try to get this across to doctors, which is one of the reasons I gave up 7 years ago, when explaining the balance issues then. Oddly, or not so oddly enough they were different sensations. These of course are brand new. Lucky me, I seem to generate a whole host of unexplainable and unidentifiable symptoms.

Anyway, It's really hard to believe that what happened last night was anxiety, as I wasn't even anxious. This was the time I was finally able to relax. In fact I felt better, before, during and after going to the store. I "should" have had major anxiety then (like I did earlier), yet I was okay, so why the hell did I get balance issues at the end of the night, when I "should" be able to fully relax, and watch tv?? That's how I feel anyway. It won't be easy getting rid of that thought.